The Adventures of Wormwartt

I would like to introduce you to a rather detestable little creature named Wormwartt. You’ll please forgive his name for anything less might fail to attest to the ugly, evil little troll that he is. And he is just that—a troll. This troll, for the want of an appealing home (if you can appealing call wallowing in the mires of a stench-filled waste land where black, bubbling tar pits litter the sad and loathsome ground) has taken up his sorry residence in the unsuspecting and completely undesirable office of one Mike Bond.

Wormwartt usually sleeps in small corners in Mike’s desk. But he spends the majority of his time running around the office wreaking havoc in any annoying way he can. You see, Wormwartt resents his forced residing in the dwelling of one who is so much larger, cleaner, and disgracefully more organized than he that, seething with unintelligible disgust and animosity, it has become his mission in life to conquer and destroy the innocent and (horribly) wonderful Mike Bond.

Wormwartt has already accomplished numerous misgivings on this account. He has successfully kindled the great Dr. Vaughan’s anger toward the young office administrator by deviously erasing important messages that proved key to certain appointments to be kept and letters to be sent. One time Wormwartt shredded valuable evidence in the likes of check stubs needed to prove valid payment that, most unfortunately for Mike, were left lying on his desk. It’s a sad, sad venture for sure but alas! There is some unfairness in all this. One time Wormwartt was in the midst of attempting to physically attack Mike from under the desk when the young office administrator swung around in his chair and caught the ugly little troll by surprise with his shoe. The blow, landing right on Wormwartt’s chinny-chin, sent him flying back smack into the wall of Mike’s desk. Wormwartt lost a tooth in the incident but not to worry, he picked it up and jammed it right back into his rotting gum beside the three other stubs he calls teeth. And, wiping a spatter of green blood from his chin, he furiously shook his fist, “You’ll pay for this, Mike Bond!”

Thus begins the adventures of Wormwartt…stay tuned!